Beijing - Part 1

Hi everyone!! How have you been? I trust you are all keeping safe and well :) If you hadn't guessed already, we'd all gone on a little trip! Yes -- my first in about four years lol! We'd actually intended to go on this holiday a year ago, but guess who got pregnant haha.. Well, the two grandmothers got together to help look after Jake while we were away -- thank you Mom and Ma! -- and we had an awesome time in Beijing, China!

One of the first places we visited was Yonghe Lamasery, or the Lama Temple. This is a temple and monastery of the Geluk School of Tibetan Buddhism. Work on the temple began in 1694; it originally served as an official residence for court eunuchs, before being converted into the court of Prince Yong. In 1722, half of the building was converted into a lamasery, while the other half remained an imperial palace.

There are five main halls separated by courtyards, with lovely names like The Hall of Harmony and Peace, and The Pavilion of Ten Thousand Happinesses, which contains a 26m tall statue of the Maitreya Buddha carved from a single piece of white sandalwood. Photography is not allowed within any of these places of worship.

The whole temple was heavy with the smoke and smell of incense -- there were many people praying there. Here, Becky is standing in front of one of the many prayer wheels; meditatively spinning the wheel would be equivalent to saying the inscribed prayer aloud.

We saw many beautiful sculptures there, but couldn't take pictures of many of them. Animals from Chinese mythology were plentiful of course; here, the kids are posing with two dragon turtles, representations of such positive traits as courage, longevity, success and fertility.

The temple is huge and after exploring it, the kids were tired out and hungry. On the way back to our hotel, I saw this painting being sold on the street. The Chinese word on the bottom is ye, but I'm not sure what that thing above it is.

This is how tired Becky was by the time we found some place to eat.

And this is what we ate. Next to the noodles are some extremely boiled vegetables, which they seem to serve as an accompaniment to almost everything, even breakfast. It was interesting, but the kids were decidedly not fond of it.

The next day we walked through Tiananmen Square on our way to the National Museum of China. The weather was gorgeous the whole time -- hovering between a lovely 0 to -7°C.

Ro was proving to be an avid photographer the entire trip.

Security was quite tight, probably because of the recent terrorist attack on Tiananmen Square, and every now and then we had to have our bags checked and go through metal detectors.

But the kids enjoyed every minute of it.

Miss Too-Cool-For-School.

The museum is huge and very impressive, with a permanent collection of over a million rare artifacts covering Chinese history from the Yuanmou Man of 1.7 million years ago to the end of the Qing Dynasty (the last imperial dynasty).

Painted terracotta infantry and cavalry from 202 BC. The artistry and sheer ancientness of these things were amazing.

A jade shroud fastened with gold threads from the same period. Jade shrouds were burial clothing for Han dynasty emperors and nobility; this one was made for Liu Xiu, king of Zhongshan state.

A bronze lamp in the shape of a goose carrying a fish from the same period. This device was brilliantly designed -- the bodies of the goose and fish are hollow to contain smoke and soot; the lamp plate and shade rotate for desired lighting or to control draughts; and all the parts are detachable for easy cleaning.

Rhinoceros-shaped wine vessel with gold and silver inlaid cloud design from the same period.

A glazed roof ridge ornament from 1038.

Roro posing with a bronze model for acupuncture and moxibustion from 1443. If you went close, you'd see that the figure was marked with meridians and acupoints from head to toe. In the imperial medical academy's exams, such figures were coated with beeswax and filled with water for students to identify the correct acupoints.

Like I'd said, the place was massive. There was lots to see, but even I was getting a little tired after awhile.

Security was really tight.

Walking home afterward, we went through Wangfujing Street, a busy, 700-year-old thoroughfare full of shops and restaurants and street vendors, with lots of crowded side streets as well which the kids were just too tired to get into.

A street vendor selling wind-up birds.

Which we bought.

Street sculpture.

A serene close to the day. More in a bit!

always take your suitcase

We'll see you again real soon!

she had rings on every finger

Hi everybody! See that pretty lineup? Each of these sweet little treasures are looking for a new home! They've been well-loved and well-kept, and, being wonderfully handcrafted by some very talented artists, they are all super special and one-of-a-kind.

As you can see, they are all very strong and sturdy, being made of sterling silver, and five of them feature the loveliest stones! These are details about the rings from left to right, going by the picture right at the top:

1. This fierce and faithful companion was hand cast from an antique button, using the "lost wax" casting method. The band is adjustable.
2. This ring features a gorgeous Botswana agate, framed with sterling silver beads. It is a size 5.5.
3. This lush lemon quartz is set in a super tall tiered bezel, with two hammered discs on each side -- a perfect cocktail ring! It is a size 5 3/4, though it feels a bit snugger due to the width of the band.
4. This one is set with an amazing star ruby! A beautiful asterism manifests in a six-pointed star that winks and moves with the light! The ruby is set in a super tall bezel and sits atop a rectangular band, hatched all over both sides. It is a size 6.
5. This gorgeous floral ring features a robin's egg turquoise and a sweet little pearl! The turquoise has a very tiny chip that occurred during setting, but it definitely does not detract from the overall beauty of the piece. It is a size 5.5.
6. This ring features a brilliantly coloured amazonite. It measures 19mm across, with eight silver balls scattered around its edge. I believe it is a size 5.

I'm selling these rings at 30 to 40% off -- they range between $160 to $75 (and that's negotiable ;) -- so they're really quite a steal! If you'd like to give any --or all! -- of them a new home, just email me at bikbik.roro@gmail.com. An added bonus? Shipping's on me :)

Have a lovely rest of the week everyone!

A bird ballet by Neels Castillon

“Hope” is the thing with feathers -
That perches in the soul -
And sings the tune without the words -
And never stops - at all -

And sweetest - in the Gale - is heard -
And sore must be the storm -
That could abash the little Bird
That kept so many warm -

I’ve heard it in the chillest land -
And on the strangest Sea -
Yet - never - in Extremity,
It asked a crumb - of me.
~ Emily Dickinson

Have a soaring, transcendent week, everyone!

go ahead and say it

Next on the vintage eye candy list -- the model for the Apollo Belvedere -- Paul Newman.

"As tasty as Creamy Caesar dressing".

And o look -- with our other favourite!

Have a gorgeous rest of the week everyone!

what is an empty desk

He knows exactly where that self-pasting scrapbook is.

So. Having gotten into a "thing" with a certain somebody about the kids' untidiness, I decided to sit down and find out once and for all if being messy was such a terrible thing. Of course, I don't really have time to do much research or a thesis on this, but I did want to look further into that famous image of Einstein coolly reading at his horrendously cluttered, untidy desk.

See, the children's messiness doesn't bother/stress/completely traumatise and spoil my whole day as much as it does.. certain people.. because I myself am unarguably, immutably UNTIDY. I've spent most of my life, from childhood up, trying my best to change, but I've finally come to accept, over 40 years later, that I can't. I am what I am. On any given day, my desk is covered with papers, drawings, notes, reading material, torn scraps and sundry piles of what may most easily be described as "things".

My mother used to take it almost as a personal affront that I didn't keep my room tidy, and it wasn't till I was nearly an adult that I one day told her I wasn't deliberately trying to make her mad; I just really couldn't help it -- I honestly didn't register how cluttered my desk or room was. The disorder was really in the outermost periphery of my mind, if it were there at all; simply put, I was entirely focused on whatever it was I was working on at the time and all that "stuff" was just white noise -- mere elevator music.

The fact was, the mess didn't bother me because it didn't negatively affect me. As any untidy person will tell you, I pretty much always knew where my things were, despite and amidst all that chaos. It was when my mother came in and tidied up, apparently unable to bear the sheer stress of seeing my stuff like that, that I would lose things. Then would begin the usual routine of, "Mo-o-om!! Where did you put my fill-in-the-blank??", followed by the nebulous, indeterminate description of the article I was in search of.

And now, almost 45 years later, my own children are being subject to the same routine. Not by me, of course. I'm the one who gets "scolded" on their behalf. And I go off and scold them, largely because I don't like having my peace being affected by such things, and all the while understanding in my heart why they must have alllllllll these things out, or why they do this this this and this and then rush off and do something else and leave them all there.

Don't get me wrong now -- as with most things, I believe balance is key; extreme hoarding, chaos and dirtiness are unacceptable and even worrying. I do expect some degree of tidiness; one oughtn't to leave Lego pieces right in the middle of the passageway for me to trip over, for instance. Clothes should be hung, borrowed items returned, and so forth. And things which even they agree is junk should be thrown out -- by them, not someone else. But is messiness so bad as to actually warrant anger? stress? conflict?

Some time ago I'd read an MIT research paper entitled Is it better to be messy or neat? An etiology of messiness. "Messiness is often associated with artistic, creative and scientific or mathematical genius, spontaneity, but also with carelessness, eccentricity, madness and unreliability. Neatness is associated with preparedness, confidence, attention to self-presentation, efficiency, and stability, but also with hierarchy, rigidity and mundanity.

"Famous examples of each personality type abound. In the messy camp, Albert Einstein, Francis Bacon, Alexander Fleming, and Alan Turing were all notoriously messy geniuses whose unkempt appearances matched their chaotic laboratories and studios...

"Why are people messy? The simplest theory is that messy individuals perceive the cost of tidying to be less than the potential benefits... A second theory is more attentional: that messy people are perpetually distracted with things that are 'more interesting' or important than tidying up. This is a subconscious choice that happens instinctively, as things grab their attention: 'as soon as we have finished with the coffee cup, it is invisible to us. We simply don’t see it. It’s like that stage of a baby’s development at which, if something leaves its grasp, it ceases to exist' [Abrahamson]" (read in its entirety here)

Interestingly, German researchers have found that a messy desk can actually lead people toward clearer, more organised thinking. They found that people actually thought more clearly when all around was chaos, as they sought to simplify the tasks at hand.

In an article for Digital Journal, the author writes, "If you understand the term 'controlled chaos', it may mean you're smarter than the rest of us. It's Monday morning and your boss walks in, eyeballs your desk and says, 'How can you find anything in this place?' If you're like me, you simply can't find anything if your world is completely clean. When we have people over, I clean the house, only to realize I will never find certain things again. To me, a clean house is disorderly, and a disorderly house is comfortable...

"Einstein once asked, 'If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what then, is an empty desk?'... Of course, Einstein's long gone, but apparently I'm not alone because Eric Abrahamson and David Freedman have co-authored a book called A Perfect Mess: The hidden Benefits of Disorder - How Crammed Closets, Cluttered Offices, and On-the-Fly Planning Make the World a Better Place...

"The book [illustrates] that those of us who aren't completely neat are more creative... The fact is, says the book, messy people generally have a personality trait that leaves them open to new experiences. We are less rule-bound. Things don't have to be exactly so to make us feel productive" (extract from the article by Lisa Angotti; read in its entirety here).

Indeed, in an interview, author David Freedman -- who also writes on science, business and technology for publications like The New York Times, The Harvard Business Review, Science, and Wired -- said, "In some ways you give up a lot when you have a neat, pristine place -- there are real advantages to messiness and what works best is really having a balance between the two.

"Neat and very organized people tend to be extremely judgmental and it's not just that they want to keep themselves neat and ordered, they have a lot of trouble with other people's messiness -- and they're constantly trying to get messy people to clean up. And we as a society have bought into this notion and the thinking is always, 'Well, there's something wrong with the messy person' and they have to change themselves to become neat.

"The thing that's the big problem is when a naturally messy person, for whom everything is working fine feels, for whatever reason, obligated to try to be neat and more ordered. That's the real problematic situation and that in fact is the situation most of us find ourselves in. Trying to get a messy person to permanently change is fruitless and will only cause tension. And studies back that idea up that you can't really change your level of messiness in any permanent way".

I agree with that last at any rate. It's not that I'm being dismissive and saying kids will be kids (though they will be) and so their untidiness is perfectly acceptable, but I am saying that perhaps there should be a bit of "battle-choosing" (I'm avoiding the phrase "don't sweat the small stuff" because I know clutter can take on decidedly massive proportions in a neat person's mind). Many adults -- the super-tidy ones especially -- take their kids' messiness as a kind of personal insult, rebellion, a display of perversity or disrespect -- they get positively offended.

I say, think of kids "holistically" -- their untidiness is just one aspect of them; it does not necessarily reflect the quality of their upbringing, nor is it necessarily bad. Insolence, defiance, delinquency and disobedience are far bigger problems, I think, and values and morals of much greater concern -- children should live on their parents' (reasonable, fair, kind) terms while they are dependent on them. But to a great extent I accept my children as they are -- to paraphrase author Joan Ryan, they are exactly the people they are supposed to be. I'm glad and thankful my kids are loving, respectful, thoughtful and obedient, so I'll celebrate their boundless creativity, their fleet-footed inventiveness, and their wonderful ability to multitask.

What's your desk like?

end of fall

1. Herringbone tweed jacket by 13threads

2. Fall leaf with pebble necklace by The Green Anvil Studio

3. Handknit arm warmers by Maybe the White Dog

4. Twig necklace by Von Cliec Xclusives

5. Pollen brooch by Z Leslie Jewelry

6. Vintage schoolgirl dress from Majik Horse

7. Bumpy bonnet by Typically Red Knits

8. Flower stick pin from Forgotten Box

hello

I got some crafting done -- one Tabby satchel.

Hi everyone! Just a super quick post today to check in and say how are you, and I hope you're all doing peaceful and well. It's been busy and challenging and lovely and sweet here -- learning to be brave, learning to be calm, learning to be grateful -- life, basically. It has brought to mind the words of my much beloved Le Fanu: "Thus, if there are afflictions, there are also comforts: great consolations, great chastisements. There is a comforter, and there is a chastener. Every man must taste of death: every man must taste of life. It shall not be all bitter nor all sweet for any. It shall be life. The unseen ministers of a stupendous equity have their eyes and their hands about every man’s portion; as it is written, 'he that had gathered much had nothing over; and he that had gathered little had no lack.’

"It is the same earth for all; the same earth for the dead, great and small; dust to dust. The same earth for the living. 'Thorns, also, and thistles shall it bring forth,' and God provides the flowers too".

Keep smiling, dear friends, see you soon!

just hold your head high and keep those fists down

As with lots of kids, Becky and Ro do enjoy their share of goggle-box entertainment, but I've taken care to always limit the amount of time they spend on it, and to monitor what they actually do watch as well. While I do allow the occasional inane programme -- ok, I have to admit Phineas and Ferb is funny -- I generally try to ensure the shows have at least some educational and moral value.

Every so often, I'll recall a show or movie I enjoyed as a child, and I'll ask my husband to see if he can find the DVD of it. The kids will sometimes moan and groan when they hear that tonight we won't be watching Barbie (get the 12 Dancing Princesses though -- it really is good), but invariably they get into -- and really enjoy -- the shows I pick.

Well, last night the hubs put on To Kill A Mockingbird, which I'd asked him to get. There was much doubtful hemming and hawing about how the kids were probably too young for it, how black-and-white movies would bore them, how racism is too deep an issue for them to grasp, etc etc. I simply said that I'd enjoyed it very much when I was their age, and that was enough.

Long story short, the kids got totally engrossed in it, Becky especially (she's eight); she even cried when Tom Robinson gave his testimony, and was later shot dead trying to escape. Without doubt the film and book bring up many deep issues to ponder -- racism, rape, the courage to stand up for one's principles, and the loss of innocence, to name a few -- and I was glad to answer Becky's questions and discuss them with her in greater detail. She asked, for instance, what "nigger" meant; when I'd explained, she likened it to the protagonist Jesminder being called "paki" in the movie Bend It Like Beckham. I was glad that she was upset by such offensive, disparaging bigotry, and the fact that it continues till this very day.

I did To Kill A Mockingbird in school when I was about 13, but it was the image of those carved figures left by Arthur Radley in the knot of the tree that has never left me since I saw the film when I was seven. Gregory Peck, still unbelievably handsome at 46, was phenomenal as Atticus Finch; the author Harper Lee -- whose own father was an attorney who had defended two black men accused of murder -- even gave him her father's watch and chain because he reminded her so much of him. And the music, written by the amazing Elmer Bernstein, is as haunting now as it was some 50 years ago.

Seeing the kids' rapt attention reminded me that some works are classic and ageless for a reason, and one should never underestimate a child's profundity. Equally, the degree to which they absorb the things they see and hear should make one very, very circumspect about their TV, and even internet and cellphone, activity. Violence, suggestive themes, lax morals and bad language are all too easily accessible in today's shows and video games, and they all have far-reaching social and behavioural implications. I think parents have a definite responsibility in this regard -- simply leaving Junior with the TV or Xbox as a babysitter is not the answer to realising his full potential or creating a better world for future generations. There are lots of helpful resources on this available, including this and this.

Have a lovely, tranquil weekend everyone!

be yourself; everyone else is already taken

Hi everyone, how have you been? I trust you're all doing well, in body and spirit. Please excuse my irregular blog visits for the present; I've been going through a bit of a challenging time these past days. Never fear, though -- the key thing is that I'm going through, and coming out victorious on the other side. I've been trusting God's perfect timing and I know I'm safe in His keeping.

Well, I've been wanting to write about something that's been on my mind a lot lately, but I know it's not something I can just churn out off the top of my head. Being largely housebound with an infant gives one lots of time for thought, and if there's one thing that's become very clear, it's that I'm one of those home-y people who really don't mind not going out at all. As I think I've mentioned before, going to the supermarket once a week is quite a sufficient high for me (and Book Depository is an added treat haha); but I'm not much into shopping, or partying -- being one of the "beautiful people" -- which, in my part of the world at least, seems to be the primary preoccupation of many.

I was thinking it's largely because of the nature of a modern city, and so wanted to write in greater detail about it. However, as I simply don't have the time to just yet -- I am in fact madly typing this while Becky's having her turn in the shower -- I will let it stew in my head for now. This evening though, I watched this wonderful episode of The Twilight Zone from 1964, which reminded me of it, and I just had to share. It's only about half an hour, so you could easily watch it over dessert or something. Overlook -- or snigger at -- the space age costumes and "modern" machines, and perhaps, like me, you'll be struck by how brilliant and prescient it is.

P.S. That quote in my title is by the much esteemed Oscar Wilde, who also said, "Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation". You are absolutely beautiful just as you are -- have an inspired, blessed rest of the week; I'll see you soon!

treasury clipping

Hello friend, by Shop Indigo Rocket, maker of fun, modish accessories for the family. The entire list is here.

1. Whale art print by Amyisla Illustration

2. Guppy pins by Bikbik & Roro :)

3. Handmade rag doll by The Dolls Unique

4. Hair bow by LumiStyle

5. Crochet baby mobile by Yarn Ball Stories

6. Fox scarf by Tre Melarance

Ghostlets!

A quick little post today, just in time for Halloween! Sweet little Ghostlets with the friendliest smiles for your coat lapel, bag, or costume -- anywhere really! They're also the perfect size for just sitting in your pocket to keep you company, and are sure to bring a smile to anyone as a gift. They're soft and cuddly, and each is one-of-a-kind; no two are exactly alike!

Ghostlet pins are in the shop now (there are only three); if you're interested in having one, be the first to leave a comment here or email me letting me know by October 4th -- I'll give you a special 10% discount code ;)

Blessed new week everyone!

kid ware

Just a quick little crafty post today. I'd painted the porcelain candy dish in the bottom corner as a gift, and on a whim decided to get the girls plates to work on as well. I was curious to see how they'd handle the colour and decoration, and honestly, I think theirs are way better than mine (mine's Leo the lion -- he seems rather subdued compared to the kids' lol)!

Roro's. I loved the confidence with which she executed each image. Do you have a favourite? Mine are the bugs and that pin!

Becky's. I love the minimalist, vaguely Scandinavian quality of this -- she too was very sure of her design and strokes. They're wanting to set up a ceramics or pottery works -- I'm seriously considering it lol!

Hooray for kid crafts! Have a peaceful, blessed week everyone!

go ahead and say it

Next on my list of vintage eye candy -- my all-time favourite, Gregory Peck. Ah, six feet three inches of gorgeousness.

"Perfection".

O, alright -- one more.

on being really really blessed

Thank you so much everyone who left me such kind, supportive comments on my last post and who wrote me such warm, encouraging emails. They meant so much to me, far more than you could know -- it's just another proof of God's loving presence in my life. With such experience and revelation come a wonderful uplifting, and reassurance of God's faithfulness.

I was just telling my husband last night how much I love his mother's cheerful, optimistic, genuinely sanguine attitude. Once, she almost died from a terrible infection, but even through the long days of being in hospital, in pain and the doctors unable to come to any conclusions, she remained calm and unworried, listening to music on her little radio, and chatting just as usual to anyone who cared to.

Referring to how people either have a glass-half-full or half-empty approach to life, my husband says she's the sort who, even if she had just a quarter of an inch of water left in her glass, would still happily say "Look how much I have!" I really need to learn from her -- I think I am, bit by bit, by God's grace.

However, I did not intend this post to be entirely serious and reflective; while I have some free time now, I thought I'd also share with you some fun stuff the kids and I had been up to -- yay! For one thing, they finally got to see Andrew Lloyd Webber's The Phantom of the Opera!

There they are at the top, all-dressed up in their silk dresses -- I hadn't told them I was bringing them to see Phantom, despite the continual begging to for months; that night I told them we were going to a friend's wedding dinner, which they bought (in fact, I think they were rather looking forward to doing that).

It was great fun of course. I hadn't seen Phantom since I was in high school; it was fascinating watching it again over 25 years later, this time with children and the added pleasure of their enjoyment. Here, a little family portrait in the theatre lobby :)

Now this is what pure happiness looks like.

The place is humongous -- I'm always impressed by this gigantic "fountain" called the Rain Oculus.

Nothing quite like a sad little monkey with cymbals to bring on every poignant memory you've ever had. Read more here!

Then, there was our little staycation! O man, I can't tell you how much I needed and appreciated that time away. I mean, you know I love Jakey to bits, but sometimes one really does need to just kick back and zone out to avoid feeling completely overwhelmed. There's Becky doing the dance of joy.

And Ro doing hers.

A hotel mirror portrait with Becky almost two years after this one. Yeah, I'm pretty set in my sartorial ways.

The kids always welcome a swim. 

All wrapped up afterward.

And then of course -- those wonderful breakfasts. How indescribably uplifting to saunter downstairs and find tables full of comfort food just waiting to be picked! I wish I knew how they do their scrambled eggs -- smooth, and sort of creamy. I'm told I make great scrambled eggs, but I still want to know how hotels do theirs! What's your scrambled egg recipe?

Another mirror portrait, this time with Ro. You can see my super fashionable thumb splint here!

Fountain fun.

Feeling luxurious with complimentary drinks after an awesome time out.

Miss Too-Cool-For-School.

I was super glad to find these Japanese fish-shaped cakes called taiyaki. I haven't had these in eons, like since I was eight or something, and always associate them with outings with my Mom. This place -- called Ooki -- has the usual red bean filling which I love, but they have other cool flavours too, like chocolate, and ham and cheese. Becky and Ro were immediate converts!

Home after a hard day's shopping (I wanted to put the word home in quotes, but Becky said don't).

Our feelings whenever it's time to go. We'll be back though -- we'll be back!!!

Have a lovely, blessed week everyone! (More pictures here :)

on freaking, loneliness and love

Hi everyone! How have you been? I trust you are all keeping well in every sense! I'd been dealing with an infection over the past few days; thankfully, I'm well on the mend now, praise the Lord.

At the start, when it looked and felt particularly nasty, I must admit to giving in to some freaking, self-pity, and emotionalism (have you noticed how sometimes, when you're going through something especially challenging, you have this pathetic "poor me" feeling that you're the only one who has ever had to endure?). This may be connected to my wacky postpartum hormones, but I'm aware that freaking and worry are bugbears I'm still in the process of conquering. However, as Joyce Meyer always says, I'm not where I need to be yet, but thank God I'm not where I used to be!

Well, after a bout of freaking self-pitying emotionalism, I collected myself, sat down to earnestly pray, and had a sudden revelation. I felt in my spirit that the root of my anxiety was twofold; first -- an unrealistic, extreme sense of perfectionism (in this instance, not being a perfect mom because I was unwell), and therefore, second -- a fear of being alone and unloved because I wasn't perfect after all.

As I prayed, I felt with increasing conviction and clarity that I was not alone and unloved, that God was with me, and that He had in fact never left me; I realised -- as my whole life right up to the present moment flashed before me -- that I have in fact always been in His keeping, and He literally holds me up and carries me when I am weak.

I felt Him trying to impress upon me that I am never alone, however I may feel, that not only is He always with me through all the imperfections of this fallen world, but He has surrounded me with people who love me as unconditionally as humanly possible despite my flaws and weaknesses, and who will always be there for me as earthly reflections of God's divine faithfulness. In this life, I think, that is all you really need. Even if you aren't a Christian, the unconditional love of even one faithful friend is such a blessing, providing an invaluable strength, help, comfort and encouragement through life's various challenges.

This verse kept coming to my mind: "The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged" (Deut 31:8). I have been meditating much on it, trying to really wrap my head around it and get it on the inside of me, rather than merely mouthing it at a superficial level without any real conviction.

Coincidentally, I am re-reading the book of Joshua at present; four times within just one chapter the Lord says, "Be strong and of good courage". Indeed, He says, "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go" (Josh 1:9; italics mine).

In quite prosaic terms, I felt the Holy Spirit telling me, "Stop freaking. There is really no need to freak about anything, nor is there any point in doing so. Life is simply all sorts of things one after another -- just take them as they come with sanguinity, a divine peace, and also with gratitude -- better that than panic and worry, which only make one uselessly miserable. Get your mind off yourself and remember that this too shall pass". When I also hear my husband, and even Becky, telling me the same things, I feel certain God is impressing on me a life-changing revelation.

I was on the phone with my girlfriend during this time and in the course of the conversation asked that she please pray for me (I am quite certain her prayers are largely inspired by the Holy Spirit, for she is never even half as eloquent or wise in her regular speech -- sorry K, haha!). Well, I expected her to pray for healing, which she did, but then at the end, she suddenly branched off into something else altogether -- she prayed that my thinking would be renewed, that I would focus on the positive, and that I would always be thankful for my strong marriage and loving family. It was a reminder of how blessed I am, something one can easily forget in the midst of self-pity or worry.

I remember Mother Teresa once said, "Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty". I am so thankful for a husband and children who tirelessly remind me that I do not have to deal with either of these. I recall, too, reading an article where the actress Anne Hathaway said, "Loneliness is my least favorite thing about life. The thing that I'm most worried about is just being alone without anybody to care for or someone who will care for me". I personally am fine with solitude and, indeed, sometimes welcome it; but since being married and having children, I have realised the joy not only of rowdy family, but also of solitude without loneliness.

Well, these have been my thoughts over the past few housebound days; I thought I'd share them with you, for they might perhaps be a word in season for someone, somewhere. These posts -- here, here and here -- came to my mind as well; I myself shall be re-reading them!

P.S. A more fun post coming up soon -- yay!

meow

Easing back into Loving Today, and picking up where I left off -- enjoy!

1. Miko Sorry poster by MathildeShop

2. Ask Me About My Cat tee by Kin Ship Goods

3. I Like Cats kitchen towel by Little Island Company

4. Silver and copper silhouette necklace by Just Plain Simple

5. Midnight cats copper pouch by do a bit

6. Leather cat necklace by Benu Shop

7. Ukulele by Celentano Woodworks

8. Secretary Cat sweatshirt by Rosie Music

sea-change

And when towards the sea you leap,

He looks as if he were asleep.

But when you once get in his range,

His whole demeanor seems to change.

He throws his body right about,

And his true character comes out.

It's no use crying or appealing,

He seems to lose all decent feeling.

After this warning you will wish

To keep clear of this treacherous fish.

from The Shark, by Lord Alfred Douglas

Well of course I wasn't referring to this sweet Guppy!

She's a custom order Guppy girl, made with the sweetest vintage flannel, and measuring a whopping 17" (well, whopping as far as guppies go). I hadn't been crafting for quite awhile, and didn't realise I was all out of stuffing, so Guppy girl had to go about half-stuffed for a few days.

Eventually, though, she was all ready to go to her new home in Halifax, Nova Scotia. She has been certified "Cozy and Huggable" by Ro :)

Have a super lovely rest of the week!

go ahead and say it

I don't watch TV much, relying instead on the nice folks at YouTube for entertainment. Well, one thing I watch with avid, fanatical interest are the old black-and-white movies, and TV shows like Alfred Hitchcock Presents and The Twilight Zone. As long as it's black-and-white, and predates the mid 60s, I'll watch it. I love the fashions and the interior decor and the big, open typefaces. I love the crisp, refined accents and the painfully corny special effects. I love the way switchboard operators had to connect every phone call, and the way front doors didn't seem to have peepholes. I love how filling the car's gas tank cost $4.42.

Well, one thing that's especially fun about these old shows is that they'd show actors in all their fascinating, youthful glory -- some of them, still alive today, continue to show a vestige of what once was; others bear only a pale, haggard resemblance, so that you're taken by surprise when you see the credits, and think, "O my goodness! That was fill-in-the-blanks??".

So, during this period of brief, stolen bloggy moments, I thought I'd use my regular Go ahead and say it feature to quickly post some of my own black-and-white eye candy favourites. I'm pretty sure you'll agree -- they don't make 'em like they used to! First up -- Robert Redford :)

"Two photos of this guy just weren't enough".

on Facebook and "friends"

Pooh and Piglet illustration by E.H. Shepard

Hi all, just a quick little post today (please forgive any typos, grammatical errors and general ineloquence -- I have to rush through these things for now you know lol!).

Well, I'd popped into Facebook, and while I was there, I decided to do something I'd been wanting to for awhile -- go through my already small Friends list and Unfriend anyone with whom I hadn't interacted for ages, and whom I knew ultimately didn't give two hoots about me or my family.

As I Unfriended these people, I wondered why I'd even Friended them to begin with; I concluded it had been some sort of vague sentimentality, or a fleeting excitement at touching base again with someone I hadn't seen for decades. But after the initial rush of "how have you beens", communication quickly died and we became largely indifferent to each other, so why keep them on, burdening them with boring updates about myself?

As you might guess, I am not one of those people who have hundreds and thousands of FB "friends". I don't quite understand the people who do, and can only conclude that they need them for work, or else they're immensely entertaining and popular, and simply can't help themselves.

My one girlfriend has some 300 friends, for instance; on asking her if she spoke with all these people regularly, or if she even really knew who they all were, she frankly admitted she didn't (I won't even ask the guy who has 2,346 "friends"). Some of them were people she'd met only once or twice at a meeting or a party and then never saw again; others were friends of friends of friends, people she didn't even know, but who seemed to feel compelled to extend their social ripple as widely, albeit meaninglessly, as possible.

I can't help but wonder how FB affects one's concept of friendship. Many people seem to use their status updates as substitutes for get-togethers, or phone calls; comments and emoticons are used to show interest or concern. There is a sort of superficiality about it all, an implication that all it takes is a quick click of a button to be considered a friend.

Considering all the activity I see people engaged in on FB, I realise I've barely scratched the surface of what the whole thing is about. It was ages before I finally joined the site -- while the rest of the world was already fully immersed in friending, poking and gaming -- and I did so eventually in order to get in touch with an old friend from university.

For me personally, FB is wonderfully useful for things like that, and keeping in touch with those who are overseas. I post the odd photo or comment now and then primarily to keep in touch with them, and that's about the extent of my FB activity. I'm rarely on, but the times I am, I see people posting a million and one things, from political gripes to what they eat every day.

(My personal bugbear were the posts detailing every little thing their kids said or did, so I was thrilled to discover the feature that lets one silence specific people who do that FB equivalent of taking out a whole string of photos from their wallet and shoving it at you. These are the sorts of things your friends would probably never do to you in person -- FB seems to bring out unaccountable things in some people).

Well, for some time I'd wanted to share an article I'd read in an old issue of Real Simple, entitled Feel Better Already. The subhead read: "So maybe you can't change your health overnight. But you can get a head start, with these 21 painless, proven ways to instantly boost your well-being (inside and out)". Well, who doesn't want to know these right!

But before I get into that, my girlfriend happened to send me an article from The Economist. I laughed out loud when I saw the title: Facebook is bad for you -- Get a life!

A recent study "has shown that the more someone uses Facebook, the less satisfied he is with life... Those who used Facebook a lot were more likely to report a decline in satisfaction than those who visited the site infrequently. In contrast, there was a positive association between the amount of direct social contact a volunteer had and how positive he felt. In other words, the more volunteers socialised in the real world, the more positive they reported feeling...".

An earlier study "found that the most common emotion aroused by using Facebook is envy. Endlessly comparing themselves with peers who have doctored their photographs, amplified their achievements and plagiarised their bons mots can leave Facebook's users more than a little green-eyed. Real-life encounters, by contrast, are more WYSIWYG (what you see is what you get)" (from The Economist; read the article in its entirety here).

Well, back to the Real Simple article. Obviously I can't copy the whole thing out here, but I'll quickly share with you a few pointers. Hopefully, you'll be able to find a back issue or the article online if you're really interested (following extracts from Real Simple, April 2013).

One, Smile -- especially if you don't feel like it. "When you smile, you trigger a psychological and neurobiological alignment with positive emotions, and that can lead to healthier living. In other words: Fake it till you make it". I agree!

Here's another: Snack on dark chocolate (yay!). "In addition to its other documented health benefits, dark chocolate may help sharpen your mind... Even better, science has found evidence for what you suspected all along: Chocolate may help take the edge of stress". Get to it, people!

Then: Try Nature's chill pills. "Take a bath with Epsom salts... Put 10 drops of lavender oil (also shown to help promote a state of calm) in 2 cups of Epsom salts. Add to warm water and soak in it for 20 minutes". Those of you with bathtubs, let me know how this goes!

Next: Take a hike. Research has found that "being in nature can improve cognitive function. In one study, an hour-long trek in a woody park improved subjects' performances on memory and attention tests by as much as 20%, compared with a walk in an urban environment. Furthermore, some Japanese research has shown that a day spent in the forest can improve immune function and decrease concentrations of adrenaline and cortisol for as long as a week". Tiny remnant rainforest, here I come!

Then: Get some "microexercise". "Studies show that everything from cognition to the lymphatic system improves if we are more consistently active throughout the day... [Researchers] found that those who got short bouts of exercise (between 1 and 10 minutes) through everyday activities experienced the same benefits, including lower blood pressure and cholesterol, as did those who continuously exercised for 30 minutes". Does getting a cup of tea from the kitchen count?

Next: Pull on socks at bedtime. "Swiss researchers found that people fall asleep faster when their hands and feet are warmer than the ambient temperature of the bedroom". Also if you can get your baby to sleep through the night.

And finally -- Get some perspective on Facebook. Researchers have found that "Facebook can make you feel bad about yourself, even if you're not conscious of it. People in the study who had large friend networks tended to evaluate their lives more negatively... people tend to post disproportionately positive updates... Also, the more friends you have, the more of those impossibly perfect updates you'll probably see". Yay for my tiny handful of real FB friends!

Have a super, feel-good start to the week everyone (and go for a walk with a friend)!