on marilyn, and being truly fabulous

I finished reading The Secret Life Of Marilyn Monroe by J. Randy Taraborrelli a little while ago. I can’t say I’ve ever been much of a Marilyn Monroe fan, or that I knew much about her or her movies. But she certainly was very beautiful, in – to me – a sad, privately hurting sort of way, and I had been intrigued by an article on her that had appeared in Vanity Fair in November last year. It looked at a whole archive of Ms Monroe’s letters, poems and diaries that were being published in a book that same month.

Naturally, much of these private writings provide a lot of insight into the kind of person she was. But some of her words made me particularly sad for her; for example, “Scream – you began and ended in air”, and “Ah Peace I Need You – Even a Peaceful Monster”.

This beautiful woman, apparently so successful and adored, saying such things, feeling such anguish and despair… well, everyone has their personal challenges it seems. I feel so sorry that she never knew the peace and comfort of Christ in her lifetime.

Well, when I recently saw Mr Taraborrelli’s book on sale at the store, I decided to pick it up and give it a read. And I’m glad I did, for it certainly is a well-written, entertaining biography.

But it is also full of sadness in its revelations. I didn’t know Marilyn had had such a difficult childhood. I just think of my own children, and I feel so terrible for her, and for all children who to this day go through the same neglect and abuse. Such mistreatment can so easily set a child up for a lifetime of misery and wrong choices.

There were many things in the book which struck me, but one thing that especially did was what she said when she was pregnant during her marriage to Arthur Miller. This was shortly after she’d come upon Miller’s journal, which, it seems, he’d deliberately left open for her to see (cruelty in its finer form?). “On those pages, Arthur confessed that he had second thoughts about having married her. She wasn’t what he’d thought she was… She wasn’t as intelligent as he had hoped and, in fact, she was someone he pitied” (p.294).

Marilyn had apparently been very much in love with Miller, and discovering that journal had been devastating to her, and made her lose a great deal of confidence in herself. It was after this, during her pregnancy, that she said, ‘“My little girl is always going to be told how pretty she is”… She was sure it would be a girl. “When I was small, all of the dozens and dozens of people I lived with – none of them ever used the word ‘pretty’ to me. I want my little girl to smile all the time. All little girls should be told how pretty they are and I’m going to tell mine, over and over again”’. (p.300).

How very, very sad. I do, in fact, know something of what she meant, which is why I always make sure to tell my daughters not only how beautiful they are, but how smart, and wonderful, and capable, and powerful they are too. And more than that, they have GOD, who loves them and is always with them – making them more than conquerors in Him (Romans 8:37).

So I was very happy to stumble upon this book B had been writing in, while I was tidying up. It’s Think Pink – The ultimate ‘go-for-it’ guide for girls! by Lisa Clark. On the back it says, “… prepare to become the star shine girl you’re destined to be and live your life permanently in the pink… dream hugely, be inspired and wear whatever you want without fear of ridicule because, let’s face it, life’s not a dress rehearsal!”

I flipped through it (no, not snoopingly! I just thought the illustrations were cute), and I saw:

What would you like people to know about you? I am a very happy girl

How would you describe yourself? A fabulous girl
What are your kick-ass qualities? Silly, funny, determined, happy

How would you sum yourself up in one sentence? Fabulous

I would love for my daughters to keep summing themselves up this way for the rest of their lives. For indeed they are fabulous and wonderful and all things great in Christ. And so are you. God loves us, and at the risk of sounding cliched, God does not make junk. Don't let a miserable childhood, or rejection, or cruel words, or challenging situations bring you down - we are more than conquerors in Him who loves us!

Remember Hebrews 13:5-6, "... be satisfied with your present [circumstances and with what you have]; for He [God] Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. [I will] not, [I will] not, [I will] not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down (relax My hold on you)! [Assuredly not!]

So we take comfort and are encouraged and confidently and boldly say, The Lord is my Helper; I will not be seized with alarm [I will not fear or dread or be terrified]".

(And her dream wish list? I wish I could fly. I wish I could drink chocolate milk for an hour. I wish I could have mushroom soup for all my meals).